Africa Time.


Ok, I've had it.  It's time to rant.

I am sick and tired of the malaise that has been used as an excuse for as far back as I can remember.  Africa Time.

In case you are unfamiliar with this sorry excuse for lateness and general fecklessness, 'Africa Time' is defined by Wikipedia as ''a perceived cultural tendency, in some parts of Africa, toward a more relaxed attitude to time. This is sometimes used in a pejorative sense, about tardiness in appointments, meetings and events.''  I prefer to define it as the delay of everything one has to do, be it deliver a report, turn up for a meeting or attend one's own funeral, to no less than two hours later than the agreed time.  Almost all Africans have arrived at a certain destination, late, grinning sheepishly at whoever they have kept waiting and then shrugging helplessly while muttering ''Africa time!'' as if its something to be proud of.

Then there's the other excuse- where the belief that everyone else is operating on Africa time, therefore everything is bound to be at least an hour late.  With this reasoning in mind, people set off for functions, meetings etc an hour late.  With everyone thinking in Africa time, everything kicks off late and if you are one of the unfortunate people who had the decency to keep time you end up bored and a little bit miffed by the time festivities begin .

I started writing this particular rant as I sat waiting for a meeting I was summoned for.  Having taken the time to leave a bit early, as I wasn’t sure of the venue, I didn’t understand why the latecomers, who eventually used the excuse of not knowing where the meeting was taking place, couldn’t have done the same.

This was one of those impromptu meetings that bosses call just because they can.  It doesn’t matter if you are sat at your desk, swamped by the reports and budgets and all manner of documents that were created solely to make your life a misery.  Oh no.  Let’s throw a three-hour meeting in the mix because, quite frankly, your life is just not hectic enough.

I won’t bore you with the mind-numbing details of the meeting.  That would be cruel and unusual punishment. And you may never read my blog posts ever again.  I’ll just end by imploring my fellow Africans to drop this ridiculous notion and at least TRY to do things on time.  By the time Wikipedia has come up with a definition, it’s clearly time to sort this shit out.

I mean, do you really think I don’t have anything better to do?  Anywhere else to be?  Oh, I get it, you think that you are far busier than I am and that the items on your to-do list far outclass mine in number and importance.  Which is why you think it’s perfectly ok to leave me waiting and to not bother apologizing or explaining when you do eventually haul your sorry butt in.

But wait.  I was supposed to be wrapping this up.  I don’t want to risk posting this entry late.

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