I have come to the conclusion that women are like avocados.
Let me explain.
I was having a conversation with a male friend of mine recently. The poor guy was being frustrated in his efforts to woo a certain young lady.
After weeks of trying to get her to go out with him and meeting a solid wall of resistance, he gave up and set his sights on someone else. Not in an attempt to make chick #1 jealous, mind. He simply acknowledged that his energy might be better spent elsewhere.
No sooner had his romantic endeavours begun to bear fruit with chick #2 that chick #1 suddenly realized that actually, this fellow was a bit of alright and could be worth her time.
My hapless friend was now in a state of total confusion. Should he back away from a sure deal and into the arms of his original conquest? Or continue on his current mission? Like a moth to a flame, and after giving chick #1 a week to stew, he went crawling back to her and left chick #2 wondering why his enthusiasm had suddenly cooled just when she was ready to give up the goods.
Like the plot of a dreadful romantic comedy, dude steps to chick #1 and finds that the 7 day window he had given her to think on her sins was 7 days too long- chick #1 didn’t want to know. She dismissed him as being ‘indecisive’. Talk of the pot calling the kettle black!
In true form, the fury of chick #2 was hotter than a day in hell, so there was no joy to be found there either. My poor friend found himself back at square one, colder and more alone than a bachelor in his muzigo on load-shedding night.
I guess you’re questioning my avocado reference.
You know how avocados have this annoying time frame between ‘I’m not ready yet, EAT ME NOW, and too late! I’m rotten!’ ? It’s so annoying.
Women, some of them at least, are much the same. Not in the sense of getting rotten. I mean you have to time them perfectly- one extra minute, one step in the wrong direction, and you’ve fluffed it.
And we all know there’s a fine line between a ripe avocado and a rotten one.
*Awesome cartoon by @DBarongo. Follow him on Twitter because he's just brilliant plus I asked you really nicely.