The past few weeks have been dominated by talk of sex tapes. You know the ones. Don’t act like you haven’t watched clips on your phone, or at least seen the stills in the tabloids. There have been cries to expel the stars of the amateur blue movies, rumours of parents dying of shock, and demands for comments and immediate disciplinary action by the institutions concerned.
In all this, I can’t help thinking there is one very important question that isn’t being asked.
Why on earth would anyone record themselves having sex?
I’ve never understood the fascination with sex tapes, to be honest. I mean, let’s face it. There are enough issues when it comes to getting jiggy without worrying about whether you look like a movie star or not. Considering the fact that this is not the moment to demand a body-double, as they may be way hotter than you, in which case asking for one would be an epic fail on your part.
Look at it this way. Sex is such a primal act. By the time someone is willing to do it with you, I think it’s safe to say that they are not really bothered by the fact that you look like an epileptic monkey when doing-the-do. Chances are, they will close their eyes and get on with it, imagining that Halle Berry or Brad Pitt are the ones in bed with them. But imagine the horror experienced by someone looking in; they aren’t enjoying the rush of pheromones or whatever being shared by the people directly involved. All they see is two (or more) people, who look not unlike epileptic monkeys.
I’ve tried to look at it objectively. I have nothing against people who decide to record themselves… but why would you do it? Boredom? A foray into the world of film-making? Perhaps the act is usually so boring that you have to remind yourself that it actually happened? If that is the case, you have my sympathies. But different strokes for different folks- I make lists to remind myself of stuff. Others make sex tapes. Oh well.
Apart from revealing something we all knew already- that university students are willing to experiment- this whole ‘scandal’ has revealed a whole other side of our society that I am not comfortable with. The rampant hypocrisy surrounding this issue is mind-boggling. The people coming out to condemn the students are the same ones asking for copies of the tapes. Some of the Facebook comments are downright ridiculous. I read one where this guy was saying if he found out his daughter had made a sex tape, he would have her stoned and her body burnt to a crisp. How helpful.
At the end of the day, let’s stop pretending that we never did anything crazy in our younger days. And if you’re going to record yourself having sex, just don’t. That stuff WILL get out.